En Gedi: Finding rest in the wilderness!

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Posts Tagged ‘farrar’

-From A Dad: Broken…but Not Finished!

Posted by Scott on November 9, 2007

Why is it that we resist being broken?  I think it is the pain, the affliction, the unknown, the stretching, the worry, the ruin, the humbleness, the running and the pulling that it takes to break us down…this is what keeps us from desiring brokenness.  This all makes sense doesn’t it?  Who in their right mind would invite death and pain and destruction into their lives on purpose?   Does God intend on doing this purposefully?  Absolutely yes!  For different reasons and for different time periods those God uses most he will hurt most deeply.

As I have contemplated Dana and I’s last 10 years we have been through which has included a tremendous amount of brokenness.  God has lead us into all kinds of situations and He has lead us out of them as well.  We have experienced pain, stretching, deep hurt, ruined lives, the very hand of a providential God molding our vessels into something that He can use.  The pain and hurt that yields  the most results for a gracious God does not come through light weight trials. 

Moses was a successful leader throughout all Egypt from a young age to about 40 years of age.  He had been trained by some of the finest minds in all the world at that time.  Moses had access to the highest authorities in the land.  He could run and play through that palace whenever it pleased him.  Then at a time of his choosing he was going to free the Israelites, however, the key words are “his choosing”.  In order for God to accomplish all He wanted for the Israelites and the leader He wanted to use for the task, He had to scrap every single last bit of selfish, arrogant, confident, man made success, and ambitious blood from within his body.  When Moses was about 80 years of age he had been a sheep herder in the desert for 40 years.  Moses was depleted as a man.  Moses most likely felt that God would never use him again for anything.  At this time, Moses was barely  a shell of the man he was at 40.  The best university Moses had attended was on the potters wheel of life.  For Moses, he was extremely humbled, no arrogance, no confidence in himself at all, worldly success was no longer a thought within his mind and heart, and the only ambition was to make through another day alive.  Now, after 40 years God had designed, molded, shaped, beat, and created a man He could use for His greater glory.  This would be the shell of a man that He would fill with Himself to free the Israelites from slavery.  Did Moses go through a two week training period and then was thrust into the lime-light?  I don’t think so…it took around 40 years to get Moses to the point God wanted Him.

King David is another human specimen that God stripped down, molded, beat, and reshaped for His glory.  As our culture today might think, when David was pronounced “King” a huge party should have taken place…parade him through town.  Be sure to send him on a book signing tour.  He should have been commended for such great achievement.  However, the streets were not lined people shouting his name as King.  This new king could not even live in a palace or the Kings tent.  For 10 years David was running for his life.  He planted himself in the land of En Gedi where God lead a team of undesirables to be David’s mighty men, his warriors.  In En Gedi, David found rest and peace for the long haul.  During that 10 years David was prodded, shaken, stripped down, and molded into “a man after God’s own heart”.  It was a time of God’s chosing that David became the King he was intended to be.   Kings are made by God and put on their thrones.

None of us that want to be used by God will get to that point without the narrow, dark tunnel of pain seemingly enveloping our lives.  Darkness tries to block us from God, but each time dark must yield to the light of our loving Lord Jesus.  As Steve Farrar has experienced it, “For the broken the Lord is very near and saves those in distress.”  Only someone that has been through a deep hurt, deep pain, deep trials, deep worries can express such profound wisdom in a time of great turmoil in others lives.  We must always remember what this life is about.  The very root of our very existence.  What the true success of our lives really is.  It is to bring honor and glory to the Lord Jesus Christ with all that we are and all that we have.  It is not about us in the least.  We are mere vessels to be broken and spilled out.   If we think for one moment that any one thing within this lifetime is about us, we have missed the mark entirely. 

Brokenness is the best thing that can happen to all of us.  To be probed to the depths of our being and scooped out.  To be snapped in half when we think everything is going so great.  To have a child born with a disease that will require a lifetime of care.  To lose a spouse in the prime of our lives.  To lose our business, savings, house, cars, and identity will prove to be an emptying experience.  At the end of the day we have nothing left of ourselves.  As a person once said that “we do not know how much we need God until God is all we have.”  Can we know who God really is if we are enjoying nothing but the best of life now on this earth?  Sure, each of us can convince ourselves we can, but when you dive deep into God’s word and look back on your life, what is there that sustains us?  What is there that has glorified God?  What have we experienced that will draw people unto Himself?   What kind of education have we really locked into our minds and hearts?  Do we really seek out the joy fo the Lord in order to make it our strength?

Looking back at Dana and I’s past 10 years I have some regrets on decisions made, but the Lord lead me all the way to that point and did not condemn me.  One thing we have both learned is that no matter how broken we are before our awesome God, He is not finished with us, but actually He is just getting us started.  The deep love of a God that chose (adopted/elected) me from before the foundations of the world and took the time to break me down to the core of my being, I could not and would not trade for all the money and success this world can offer.  A relationship that has been drawn out by Him…patiently waited upon by Him…new mercy each morning for us, demands my life, my soul and my all.

David said, “It was good for me that I was afflicted.”

-Scott Bailey (c) 2007

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-En Gedi: Place of Rest for Men!

Posted by Scott on November 7, 2007

En Gedi!:  A Place of Rest For Dads, Husbands, & Men!



Hello Gentlemen, I want to welcome you to the En Gedi site.  A place of rest and also a stronghold for God’s mighty men.  This is a blog site that was designed for men, dads, and husbands as a go to for resources, websites, recommended books, encouragement in our daily lives and walk, or to just rest for a moment to concentrate on God’s vastness. 


The two pictures you see above are actual photos taken at En Gedi (Engedi) in the mountain regions of Israel.  En Gedi was a place that David used high in the mountains to rest, hide from his enemy, and hear from God.  This place is surrounded by The Wilderness of Judah to the west, the Dead Sea to the east and barren rocky terrain and then you come upon this seemingly ”oasis” where waterfalls of fresh water flow and greenery abounds with caves carved out in the side of the mountain.  What a place God had made just for David in his time of need.  So, I called this site Engedi as we men need a place to rest, sometimes hide from our enemies, and above all to hear from God.

Have you ever just sat down and gazed off into a sunrise or sunset or listened to the sound of a mighty waterfall?  Take your thoughts from daily life and place them on the God that created the heavens and the earth and praise Him for it.  Here on this blog a number of topics are covered, recommendations made, tips for daily living, messages from a man, dad of 10 kids, and husband’s heart, etc.  I did not want it to be just a site where you will read constant debates over trivial or sometimes deep issues and subjects…life is far too short to waste it debating all the time and they are plenty of blog sites to do that on…of course there is time and place for debating, I have nothing against that, just not on my site.  If you want to debate that is fine, but this site is designed so you can pour yourselves into topics of theological subjects, gather encouragement from life experiences, resources to do your own research, and so on. 

Future Bailey Men!

The Bailey Boys…future soldiers for Christ!

  I encourage each person that has stumbled upon this site to read, go to the other links and read, and pass this site along.  You can simply refer it to other as www.DadsDevoted.com and it will bring them right back here.  I encourage each dad to seek out what he really believes in his heart about God and pass that on to your children.  I encourage each husband to dig into the word of God and challenge your wife to do the same….share your findings, questions, and thoughts with her.  Allow your wife the opportunity to listen to something from your heart  that is more than football, cars, and other secular events…these are important areas of life, but our wive’s would like to see a deeper side of us on occassion.  Grow deeper together glorifying God and furthering His kingdom.  For the man that may not have kids or be married yet you can certainly challenge your walk with Christ and feed that desire to know God deeper.  If this blog can do nothing else, I would hope it at least prompts us all to a facination with God, to grow deeper in our walk with Him, and to discover what life really is all about!  

We have readers from all over the world.  Here is where some of the most recent readers are from:  Novaya, Khanty-Mansiy, Russian Federation/ Denton Cheshire, UK/ Gurgaon, Haryana India/ Dublin, Ireland/ Beijing, China/ Leiden, Netherlands/ Victoria, British Columbia, Canada/ Toronto, Ontario Canada/ Riyahl, Ar Riyah Saudi Arabia/ Brazil/ Romania/ Australia/ Singapore/ Manila, Phillipines/ Johannesburg, Gauteny South Africa & Parow, Western Cape South Africa/ Sesimbra, Setubal Portugal/ Dallas-Katy-Frisco-McKinney-Houston-Irving-Prosper, Texas/ States of Florida, Virginia, California, Massachusets, Florida, Iowa, Georgia, Arizona, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Illinois.  Lots of other cities, countries, and states not mentioned, but the readership is International.  Thanks and keep coming back.  We hope you are blessed and God touches your heart in a mighty way. 

imagesjc1.jpg  Enjoy the site and I hope you will stay a while, make comments if you wish and by all means start your own blog.  Writing is great therapy!

 Scott Bailey

**I have found En Gedi or Engedi spelled both ways in the Bible depending on what translation.  Some maps show it both ways as well.  Just to let you know that it is still the same place no matter the spelling of the place.

***If you have a wife, lady friend, or woman in your life that could use encouragement please refer them to www.LivingStones4Moms.com.  My wife is a terrific writer and listener to what God conveys through His holy word.

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-One Dads Encouragement to Single Moms!

Posted by Scott on October 15, 2007


I have reflected on the single parenting issues and I am constantly reminded in the paper, news, email, Internet and our neighborhood about a third of our homes out there have children raised by brave single moms.  This is not an easy venture to undertake.  Different events have lead these moms to raise their kids while being single.  No matter what the cause of their “singleness” they are still undertaking the role of mom and dad to these children and have been appointed by God to do so.  I do not have to speak from experience to say this is a daunting task.

“The LORD watches over the alien and sustains the fatherless and the widow…”

-Psalm 146:9 NLT

I have been researching online, books on the fatherless, and the scriptures.  Everyone seems to come up with a cause, but only God’s word speaks of how to cope as a single mother.  In one story we don’t hear much about Jesus’ earthly dad, Joseph, beyond about the time Jesus was 12 years old.  He relied on His heavenly Father from that point on.  This is a great lesson for all of us parents.  It is only by the grace of our heavenly Father that any of our kids turn out good.  For the most part, as parents, we will fail in comparison over and over again.  As hard as we try we will fail as parents many times.  Yet in the end, God’s graciousness shines through and these kids make us proud parents. 

l1d64jcate2mjocajekc56ca7me1jucafrzrhkca5vq1h0calaasjycapm11pmcakw3wdqcae3s628cae4n9v0cafqx8i9cahh01iaca0t6lcnca54zm3xcaw47u0ucaj67vhbcad6yxszcaxl9oti.jpg  God has a plan for each of our kids.  These plans were created long before the earth was spoken into existence.  Our kids will be something when they grow up all for the glory of God.  We usually never have an idea until they are about 40 years old as to what that really is…I can say that since I am about to turn 40!  We do know that God has placed these kids with us to help mold and shape their future.  He put these kids into our homes so that we would give them everything we can from what God has created in us to be.  Our experiences are from God.  These experiences can be shared with our kids in order to instruct them.  Now, the plan that God has for our kids could mean that they are raised in a home with both the biological father and mother.  This could mean they are raised in a home with one step-parent and one biological parent.  This could also mean they are raised in a home with only a mom or a dad….otherwise known as the single parent.

 “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

-Joshua 1:9 NLT

For the single mom, in the beginning I am sure it will be overwhelming to think about raising these kids alone.  The range of emotions that will fill your life at the moment of realizing you are going to raise these kids alone can only be imagined by someone that has experienced the same range of emotions.  TO help cope with this reality would be to find any moment of quietness in your day to just be still…don’t read anything, say anything, don’t have a radio or tv on, just be quiet and clear your mind as best you can to prepare to listen for God’s hope, encouragement, and light.  In this quietness which may only be a minute or two, you may experience His breath upon your head, the fragrance of His spirit being near you, or simply just a calm, but reassuring  silence that He is near.  After a moment of stillness you can begin to meditate or read from the Bible whatever you are studying.  If you do not have a place to start, go to Psalm 1:1 and begin there…you will find peace and inspiration for the road ahead in Psalm.  Try not to move too quickly through the passages.  Chew on every word.  Smell each page as you read.  Imagine with your mind the words that are taking place in each verse.  Meditate on this for a long while.  Now, you are ready to pray to God.  Your prayer may not vocalize as you thought it would, but your heart will be in much better shape to go before your heavenly Father.  You will find a new strength about raising these kids by yourself.  Now, begin to introduce each child to their heavenly Father.  Involve them in reading about the attributes of God.  Help them along to experience and get to know their heavenly Father in a way that most kids do not know God.  I cannot stress enough the need for your kids to know God above all else. 

The kids strength will rely on their belief in God and what they believe about Him.  The kids character will be shaped by what they read about concerning God, what they observe in your life about Him,  what the Bible says about God, how the church you attend worships God, and how they pray to Him.  For kids being raised by single moms the pursuit of holiness is crucial to their purity and security in the future.  Place into their life a confidence in God’s strength not their own strength.  Remember, you do not have to involve them in every event that the schools and churches put on the calendar.  Do not bend to the kids pier’s pressure as to sports, birthday parties, and other events.  If you do not guard this area of your families life it will only further frustrate you in your quest to raise these kids as best you can.  You only do what you can do and not disrupt your family unit.

23114766.jpg  The boys will want to play organized football someday.  Please, moms, listen to what I am telling you on this.  LET THEM PLAY FOOTBALL!  Not until they are about 13 years old though….I believe this to be the best age to start a boy playing football.  Yes, they may get hurt.  It’s alright to let them get hurt.  I know that it is a mothers tendency to want to protect your kids and not let them get hurt, but this is a right of passage for a boy.  The scars on their arms and legs become trophies down the road with their friends.  Raise these boys as you would want them to be as young men.  A young man that has never experienced pain and hurt will not step up and protect his family.  They will not step in front of that on coming car to save their girl friend, wife and/or children.  They will not be willing to fight over seas or in the country to protect our freedoms.  They will not want to take any chances that might injure them in the future.  The decisions you make now on this subject will be huge in determining the kind of young man your son(s) will be in the future.  Since about one third of families today are single family homes, then we need moms to be tough in this area.  This is the role a father would take, but since you are the mom and dad, you must put aside the mothering instincts in this area and like a dad would do which is to embrace their yearning to play a rough sport and slap them on the back enthusiastically to say “YES” they can play.  Again, it is important how you tell them they can play as well.

1-boys-fishing.jpg  Another reality about boys is the fact that especially when they are smaller they like dirt, worms, snakes, mice, anything that creeps and crawls upon the ground.  They will fill their pockets with these varmints…please enjoy these moments with a grimly smile…they love to be “earthy”.  This is just how boys are.  Don’t forget that boys like to go fishing.  Either take them or find a man that you trust to take them fishing…this is important.  I refer you to read more on the things Dads want Moms to know about boys article.  Click on About Boys here to go directly to it.  This has some great short quips about boys.  You can also click on Encouragement and read from a mother of 10 children perspective on raising boys…my wife Dana!  

Finally, moms, I want you to know that you are up to this task with God’s strength upon your life.  You may need to pull in grandpa, uncles, brothers, men in the church, neighbors, or whomever you can trust as a man to assist in raising your son(s).  It is great to have a manly figure in your child’s life on occasion.  This can help reinforce your parenting as well.  You are the parent, but it does not hurt to ask for help as God prompts you to do so.  Point these boys to read and study on great men in history.  Point them to great men of today they can read on.  Use videos as well to help these boys establish a mentor role model male.  Some great men I would recommend your boys getting to know are Theodore Roosevelt, George Mueller s8oytgcav4tqhmcagi1i0eca2ga8cyca05kqsfcay73doicajqiof1caevznjrca3rpygxcaz4rzq4ca9f51boca0g9olicalrsadeca0xxlsmca7srkxycaehdq01cam5v1etcafspj8jcau7fzjz.jpg, Charles Spurgeon, Ronald Reagan 8ifg22caej91s5caarj4lzcad522vgcatemf76cac2uv0lca6a1i8mcarvwhbrcacxitr0cag50kvfcaxu500ucafndfdpcahaldymca7e00ahcapnjeatcasiihs5casfh51zcae4jfnwcabgpb3c.jpg, Sir Winston Churchill, Chuck Swindoll, John Piper, Steve Farrar, Tony Evans, Dr. E.V. Hill, and John Wayne 130-157john-wayne-posters.jpg.  Books and movies to see are End of the Spear, Tombstone, True Grit, Tucker, Miracle, Seabiscuit, Its A Wonderful Life, and many others that show true masculine heroes and sacrifice.  Your influence on these boys growing into young men will depend on you as a mother not “feminizing” your boys at all.  Treat them different than your girls.  Girls should be feminized, but boys need to be rough, dirty at times, tough, smelly, and anything else that separates them from the girls…the tender moments will come and those are good to.  Books (other than the Bible) for you to read that can give you ideas for your boys and their raising are Standing Tall by Steve Farrar, King Me by Steve Farrar 88om5rcaz3azfbcajpj6o1cacz0jf9ca2o5ynmcaowlw67cabud7nnca4vaio9caua3h8xcago51xwcaoxe753cat3d6grca0erzgicayaq2a9caznsun3ca772y0eca1zrndwca0hkv1mcas4395x.jpg, How to Ruin Your Life by 40 by Steve Farrar bo17rmcayeyszscaw79jscca65hx9pcajekrmmca3lbolrcaj88ctccazr4zizcadlb5u0cat3i544cag7kii8ca9ei4vqca0cgttjca9m9q8fcaa1okohca8ypnvmcala8ghdcaxx2nw8ca8jaeoa.jpg, Man to Man by Chuck Swindoll05y2g7cauiz91pcaj6vr25ca47tviacacwj3m4camy0yp8cac39iuvca2i28ecca5l79rbcakd0dn5caci8ytocahsf1krca3m7937caapgt1bcans2kapca8ncrv0camccp07ca2w2awpca2a39d9.jpg, Talking with My Father by Ray C. Stedman, The Letters of Theodore Roosevelt For His Sons, The Bible Lessons of John Quincy Adams For His Son, What’s the Difference by John Piper, George Mueller on Answered Prayers, and many others.  A great book for you to read along with your younger boys is The Dangerous Book for Boys by Iggulden.  

Moms you have been singled out (no pun intended) by God for a wonderful task.  Your singleness is not by chance or for your destruction.  It is by design that you are single raising these boys.  God has a special adventure for you with these boys.  This adventure called life will be one of the most rewarding times in your life if you will embrace this challenge head on.  God is now in the role as the true Father of these kids…make sure they are brought up understanding this.  Point them to His sacrifices, His plan for them, His fresh mercies each day, His unfailing love for them, His creation in everything they can see and hear, and point them to His word in the Bible.  Keep plugging on…it will not be easy, but you can raise godly sons that will glorify God.

Look for resources online to help you through these years as a single parent.

-Scott Bailey (c) 2007

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